Can you imagine how it felt? And what it must be like to see your fellow countrymen throw it all away over the years?
Here is my 100 word (on the nose this week) story for Madison Woods’ FridayFictioneers. It’s about an old man alone with his thoughts after hearing a friend has died and realizing he’s the last of his kind still standing.
I’m posting it early because by the time Madison kicks things off it’s midnight on Thursday here and I get hammered trying to keep up. WordPress starts counting hits on its own schedule and I’m trying to beat 180 views. Have to utilize the full 24 hours. There, I’ve gone and exposed myself as a greedy stat monkey. Oh, well. I’m going to try to rock the Casbah anyway. Thanks for reading. Tonight at midnight I’ll add the link for all the other stories by changing the color of the word ‘here‘ to red. Check in and read, comment and post your own story. (I think we’re going to be long on werewolves and such, but hey, there’s a full moon out so what do you expect?)
Aloha,
D.
I remember skip-hopping, my charcoal smudged white boots raising silent dust fans that fall in perfect slow motion parabolic arcs. Shadows deep and dark contrast with the harsh glare of the sun in a starless sky. My suit ventilation system hums in the background of distant and excited radio transmissions.
Even now when I think of her I smell burnt gunpowder and feel the grit on my teeth.
The memory helps this old pilot write and when I see her riding high she reminds me that I once walked on her surface. The vibrations thrum through her core yet..β¦and mine.
Since you are such a suck-up, let me be first to cast a like!
Oh, good story, btw… Made me think of Gene writing his daughter’s initials on the Moon.
Hi Ted,
I’ll take the ‘likes’ of you any day. Thanks for being the first of the gang. (I’m actually just trying to break a personal record for page views and they only come on Fri/Sat of FridayFictioneer reading. WordPress splits it somehow, what with me being in Hawaii and all. I’ll get it sorted sooner or later.)
Keeping my eye out for your story soon.
Aloha,
Doug
Greedy stats monkey. I laughed so hard at that. The little stats counter turns us all into greedy stats monkeys so I’ll not hold it against you.
I really liked your story! I felt like I was sitting beside your character as he was telling about a treasured experience. Very nice. Mine will be up later. I can always venture back later to post my linky. Thanks for sharing. π
The truth will out, they say, and I guess it has.
Thanks for dropping in and reading (and laughing!) I’ll find your as soon as you post it.
Aloha,
Doug
How are you doing on that goal? I bet you’ll make it today!
Here’s my linky: http://unduecreativity.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/she-called-to-him/
I must admit, I’m a bit guilty of being a stats monkey myself.
Your story was wonderful. I can only imagine the feeling of being able to look at the moon like that. I’m sure it’d be a bit surreal.
My first thought when I saw the photo was werewolf, so I steered clear of it like the plague. Speaking of plague: http://authorbrandonscott.wordpress.com/2012/05/10/death-cart/
Dear Brandon,
Thanks for reading and adding your kind comments. Loved your segue into the plague and your story as well. I lit it up a little. Let me know if that’s alright with you. I’m a quick study.
Aloha,
Doug
You outed yourself! LOL
I really like this piece and the pride it evokes…I remember how fascinated we all were, sitting close to our television sets and seeing the most fantastic adventure imaginable–our guys up there–gone to the moon. It was one of our finest hours! How real you make it for us again. Thanks for a good read Doug!
Dear Jeannie,
Amazing times they were. I fear we’re part of an Idiocracy now. Caught in the backwater’s of history. Keep reminding people of what’s possible. You never know what might yet happen in our lifetimes (but oh, the forty year hiatus was such a waste.)
Thanks for dropping in. i’ll find your story when Madison pulls fires the starting pistol.
Aloha,
Doug
Stats? People keep track of stats, really? As if I don’t know…
Your story is wonderful, if not a bit sad. Truly I thought we’d have a lunar base by now. Ah well, the Chinese will probably get there first. Speaking of which, here’s mine: http://teschoenborn.com/2012/05/10/friday-fictioneers-et-wannabe/
Nice segue into your story! Thanks for stopping in and reading.
Aloha,
Doug
What stats? π
I loved this; it reminded me of a time when, as you say, we thought we were seeing the beginning of something, when in reality it was just the opposite. Sometimes I can’t believe it was never taken further…
You captured the magic of the moon perfectly; will we ever tire of looking at it and wondering.
Mine’s http://castelsarrasin.wordpress.com/2012/05/10/you-called-friday-fictioneers-may-2012/
Dear Sandra,
You’re a laugh riot. It’s amazing what comments my ‘greedy stat monkey’ admission has elicited. Thanks for dropping by.
Aloha,
Doug
Stats? What’re they? There speaks the mathematician in me….lol
Great piece, Doug. Love that you brought the moon to centre stage with the narrator’s voice. And the ‘excited’ radio transmissions made me grin π
Ours is here: http://www.lazuli-portals.com/flash-fiction/moon-and-sky and is just over 160 words.
Dear Joanna,
Thanks for stopping by and reading. I just finished yours and left a comment. Thought it was a true horror story of everyone’s life. Hope I never go there. Don’t know if it will show up. Hope it does.
Aloha,
Doug
Just moderated it, and it’s there π Thanks!
Like your concept! mine is here: http://oldentimes.wordpress.com/2012/05/10/its-here-the-weekend-is-nigh-fridayfictioneers-on-buffalo-river/
Thanks for visiting and commenting.
Aloha,
Doug
I really loved this one! Don’t know what I can say that hasn’t been said already. Here’s mine: http://www.rochelle-wisoff.blogspot.com
Hi Rochelle,
Thanks for visiting. Just got done reading yours. Good job.
Aloha,
Doug
Ha, I did comment on this one. Looks like a pretty good “haul” of comments to feed the junkie. π And here’s one more.
I like the imagery of your first paragraph. Nice! Here’s my story: http://wp.me/p1WuR1-TH.
Hi Caerlynn,
thanks for visiting. Headed your way right now.
Aloha,
Doug
Oh, that was very beautiful, Doug. And your ending sentence with “her core” was brilliant. Gorgeous. This photo prompt was too evocative for me and I simmered it down to its core myself.
here it is:
http://fictionvictimtoo.blogspot.com
Aren’t we all stats monkeys? Wow, a beautiful walk on the moon. And thanks for your visit. Mine is here, for the sake of other readers: http://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/fridayfictioneers-tanoas-baby/
I thought I was alone in my stat monkey status. Nice to know it’s not true. Thanks for visiting and reading.
Aloha,
Doug
Oh, Doug, this was wonderful. Every time I look at the moon, I remember the footprints of humans are on it, but you have expressed it so well. Thank you!
Here’s mine: http://unspywriter.wordpress.com/friday-fictioneers/in-moonlight-and-peace/
Thanks, Maggie.
I appreciate your comments very much. I wish we’d followed up our first foray to the moon with many,many more. We could have had a city there by now. (Instead of all these stupid, useless wars.)
Aloha,
Doug
So true, and the only thing Newt Gingrich and I agreed on.
Maggie
From one greedy stat monkey to another (160 was my busiest day so send everyone you know over to click on me!) – this tender little story made me feel sad for the aging pilot who has nothing but the past to reflect on. This was a beautiful flash, Doug.
Can’t get clicks if I don’t share the link! Here’s mine:
http://michaelsfishbowl.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/i-miss-you-so/
Thanks for your nice comments, Mike. I wish you luck in your stat quest. I just got tired of splitting my hits between two days. Being here in Hawaii I was getting hosed by time zones. Decided to post as WordPress changed days in the stat counter.
Aloha,
Doug
Lovely writing, Doug, as we have come to expect. What page view counter? I just look at the number of comments and subtract my responses. I don’t think I’d want to know more.
I too remember the moon landing but under rather different and surreal circumstances that I won’t go into here, other than to say I had no idea what was going on; I thought there was something wrong with my television.
I agree about how much further we could have gone if we’d spent war money on space travel. Or anything else: medical and science research of any and every kind. Education perhaps most of all. But it’s a logical conundrum, a recursion: because we make unenlightened choices, perhaps it’s a good thing we remain confined to the planet we are destroying until we learn not to destroy.
Dear Carlos,
I’ve got a widget on my dashboard that tells me how many views I’ve had…hey, are you pulling my rubber leg?
I like your story about not knowing what was happening during the moon landing. That sounds as though it would make an interesting post one day. Thanks for visiting and commenting, my friend.
Aloha,
Doug
β”I suddenly became strangely inebriated. The external world became changed as in a dream. Objects appeared to gain in relief; they assumed unusual dimensions; and colors became more glowing. Even self-perception and the sense of time were changed. When the eyes were closed, colored pictures flashed past in a quickly changing kaleidoscope. After a few hours, the not unpleasant inebriation, which had been experienced whilst I was fully conscious, disappeared. What had caused this condition?”β Dr. Albert Hofmann – Laboratory Notes (1943)
Very touching piece that leaves me feeling everything the MC does. Well done, fellow stat monkey.
I like this. I like how the moon was alive, as well, and how you described the tactile senses, too. Very good piece! Here’s mine, if you have a minute: http://theforgottenwife.com/2012/05/11/friday-fictioneers/
Thank you for visiting and commenting. I dropped by your piece and was delighted to find such a deep poem based on the prompt.
Aloha,
Doug
Thank you!
if I knew how I would embed a gif of someone clapping because that’s all I could think of.
I think I mean the story was so good I’m speechless./
Dear Craig,
I just woke up after a few hours of sleep. Trying to get started and ride the wave. I don’t know when WordPress changes from Friday to Saturday but I think it’s soon. Ah, well…
Thanks for your fine compliments. Coming from you they mean more than most and I appreciate them very much. I’ll track yours down soon.
Aloha,
Doug
And what’s wrong with having a healthy interest in ‘stats’, I mean if you ask any statistician they make the world go round don’t they? LOL
Great story, makes me think of something in the far future when we are past going to the moon and a sense of sadness about it too.
Thanks for your comment on mine and for other readers here is my attempt: http://womanontheedgeofreality.com/2012/05/11/friday-fictioneers-painting-creation/
Dear Linda,
Nothing wrong with an interest in stats in my mind. The readership/participant list of FridayFictioneers has grown since its inception and I get a kick out of riding the wave. Thanks for your comments. I really appreciate them.
See you next week?
Aloha,
Doug
I’ll definitely be back and help increase your stats.
Well, Doug the count is up to two on my blog this morning and yours at 40 as of this comment and Madison at 77 as of 7 am Central time. I really enjoyed the moonwalk story. The space program is responsible is responsible for a lot of the things we take for granted in today’s world. I hated to see the shuttle program shut down.
here’s mine http://russellgayer.blogspot.com/
Dear Russell,
Good morning. I just got up after a few hours of sleep. Have about 24 more page views before I reach my goal but WordPress calendar clocks are ticking. Have to figure out how to respond via email for an entire 24 hours cycle. (Don’t think that will ever happen. Unless I become a better writer or a viral sensation somehow, I’m going to have to settle for some sort of theoretical limit to the numbers game. It was a nice experiment and maybe a lesson learned. Be a better writer.)
In any event, thanks for your compliments. I appreciate them a lot.
Headed your way now.
Aloha,
Doug
This is a powerful piece on memory and the recall of amazing actions beyond the usual ken of mankind. Beautifully done. Thank you for your comment on mine. π
Here it is for others:
http://siobhanmuir.blogspot.com/2012/05/watchers-100words-for-fridayfictioneers.html
Siobhan
Hi Siobhan,
Got your tweet, thanks. And thanks for the comments left here, too.
Aloha,
Doug
Hey Doug, this reminds me listening to my Dad talk about his time in service. A lot of his friends are no longer here. What’s sad is even though I just got out myself some of my friends are starting to disappear as well. oh and even though you already visited here’s my flash for the week. Oh and thanks for the catch. Those one am posts mess me up. http://remakingme-atiyatownes.blogspot.com/2012/05/friday-flash-fiction-birthing.html
Thanks Atiya,
I appreciate you reading. I know what it’s like to post something and go to bed then wake up and go, “Oh, darn…better fix that quick.” Some people are sensitive to having things pointed out in public. Can’t figure that out, but hey, that’s me. Glad you’re not one of them.
Aloha,
Doug
Since I’m new at this, I’m not tracking stats yet. I’m sure it will happen down the road. Very nice job. It’s amazing how many different perspectives there are. Here’s mine: http://melodypearson.com/flash-fiction/friday-fictioneers-photo-prompt/
Dear April,
I’m up early riding the WordPress wave and screwed up your name in the comment I just wrote you on your story. Apologies for that.
Thanks for reading and commenting here. i appreciate it more than you know.
Aloha,
Doug
Thanks for letting us in on the stat secret to success, you little stat monkey, you. Loved your story — very unique and creative perspective of the prompt!
–Jan
Dear Jan,
What secret? What success? If I knew the answer to either I’d be a happy camper. I think it has something to do with being a good writer. perhaps I’d better just focus on that, and that only. Stats will probably take care of themselves.
Thanks for stopping in and reading.
Aloha,
Doug
lovely imagery π
Here is mine: http://oni1138.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/escape/
Thank you, Sir!
Aloha,
Doug
Thank you, Sir.
Aloha,
Doug
Great stuff – it’s another way of looking at the moon and one that’s entirely logical when you think of it.
Good! really good and different. LOL
Thanks, Jean,
Aloha,
Doug
I’ve missed your writing, Doug. This was quite a welcome back. This love affair with the moon was a treat to read! As always, glorious.
http://quillshiv.com/2012/05/11/the-first-world/
Dear Rinn,
And I’ve missed you, too. Thanks for dropping by and commenting.
Aloha,
Doug
You may be a stat monkey, but you’re a stat monkey who can write! That was lovely and sad. Not just being the last of the first, but the living past that one superlative moment.
Kathy
http://notforallmarkets.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/stay/
Dear Kathy,
Thank you for your insightful and complimentary comment. i live and die by them and appreciate it greatly.
Aloha,
Doug
Aloha Doug: You Stats Monkey. How do you find the time? I have enough trouble keeping up with all these stories…jotting down whom I’ve read and leaving comments. Loved your story but sad that he is one only one left. Your notes, tidbits and stories are a joy to read. Loved everybody’s interesting, fun, challenging comments as well. I, of course, am old enough to remember the fear and awe-struck wonder of Sputnik and the excitement of USA landing on the moon…which future generations will never experience until the Chinese get there…(but will USA sit back and allow that to happen)? I am eagerly awaiting June 1st when the Enterprise arrives at the Intrepid Museum (docked at Pier 84 on the Hudson River), which I can see from my hi-rise 46th flr. apt. and 2 blocks walking distance. Also…thank you, dear Doug, for leaving your inspiring comments to my “biblical” story.
Dear Lora,
Will you send me a picture of the view from your lanai? Must be wonderful.
Yes, the Chinese on the moon will waken our nationalistic pride and perhaps we’ll get off our butts and they’ll let us rent a seat on their trip to the moon, but I doubt it. We’ve lost our internal compass. Wall street greed, morally bankrupt politicians, entitlement junkie citizens, Idiocracy grown to lunatic proportions. I’d move to the moon in a heartbeat if it meant I could get away from the drones of this world.
Curiosity rover is a few months from landing on Mars. That should be a shot in the arm if we can pull off the landing. Stay tuned and thanks for commenting.
To answer your question, the stars aligned this week and I was able to put everything in a line for a WordPress syzygy. I posted when WordPress changed days from Thursday to Friday, had three days off bracketing those comment writing time and stayed up for almost the entire twenty-four hour span writing comments and responses. It all worked out and I’ve got a new record now. 214 views. Left me with questions, though. If I had that many views but only 70 comments (half of which are mine in response) then what’s up with that? Only 35 or so people saying anything? I might have rounded up enough facts to make me put down the stat monkey. Better to concentrate on good writing and let the numbers take care of themselves.
Oh, well, it was fun while it lasted.
Aloha,
Doug
Hi Doug,
Hope you don’t go blind reading all these comments. And you’re not a stat monkey, you’re a social butterfly. At any rate, your take on the photo is cosmic, and far out. You took this prompt very literally, didn’t you. Thanks for the fun comment on my story. I’m sending you some dehydrated spring water. To reconstitue it, jut add water! Ron
Oh, and I meant to ask. Aren’t there any werewolves on the moon? I would think they would love it there. It would be like having a full moon all the time.
I’m writng this reply just to improve your stats.
Dear Ron,
You’re intentions are admirable and I thank you for the attempt to inflate my numbers, but doesn’t that defeat the purpose? I’ll think it over while I’m reconstituting that water.
(I just checked and I set a new record thanks to you and my tactic of starting the cock when WordPress did. 212 or so views. I’m worn out now. going to go finish tiling the bathroom.)
Thanks,
Aloha,
Doug
Doug, This is one of my favorite pieces. The phrase “the vibrations thrum through her core yet…and mine,” remind me of my brother and his love for flying (not in a spaceship, though). When he talks about the thrill of flying, he just glows–thrums in his core, so to speak. Well done, as usual.
Mine: http://www.vlgregory-circa1800.vpweb.com/blog.html
Dear V.L.,
I read your story early on yesterday but was stymied from leaving a comment. made me very, very crazy. I thought it excellent and asked why did your MC want to kill the eagle? Ceremonial feathers?
Thanks for your comments here.
Aloha,
Doug
i liked it. quite.
Thank you. Much.
Aloha,
Doug
I think it’s neat that you thought of how an astronaut feels looking back at the full moon. I sometimes cover the moon with my thumb just like Tom Hanks does in Apollo 13-and I am amazed all over again.
Here’s mine:
Hope I get over 180 hits in one day, one day, haha. Great story, your descriptions really set a scene. “….that fall in perfect slow motion parabolic arcs.” Love that line, I learnt what ‘parabolic’ means, might use that word some time.
I’m sure you will and sooner rather than later. I managed 220 or so today. I pronounce the experiment a success. Thanks for visiting and commenting.
Aloha,
Doug
Love it – very clever point of view. I really enjoyed this one!
Thanks Erin,
For visiting and for commenting.
Aloha,
Doug
Sorry I didn’t get here sooner, help get your stats up! Though obviously stats don’t interest me. Nope, not at all…ahem. π
Your story has such a wonderful, romantic feel to it. It’s almost poetic, bringing forth genuine warmth and affection from both the narrator and reader.
Dear Gary,
I don’t care about stats either (nose growing longer) but I thank you anyway for adding to them as well as for the kind comments for First of the Last.
Aloha,
Doug
I totally believe that you did walk on her surface. Beautifully written and you’ve drawn me in.
http://mysocalleddutchlife.wordpress.com/2012/05/12/following-footsteps/
Thanks for reading Last of the First and leaving a comment. I just read your story and can tell you that the story is strong within you. Hope you return next Friday.
Aloha,
Doug
A great take on the prompt Doug. The adding of the extra photo added to the nostalgia of the story.
As for stats – I like to be virtuous and say they don’t interest me … but I’d be lying!
I looked until I found a photo where the astronaut appeared totally absorbed in the experience. The one I chose has him walk/runnig away from the camera and into the lunar day. Thanks for mentioning that picture and for commenting on the story. i hope/know we’ll return there someday.
Aloha,
Doug
Your imagery is captivating. Your words are like a hand-picked bouquet. I was thinking of using “starless” in mine but couldn’t get it quite right. You did, though. Excellent choice of subject.
Here’s mine: http://wp.me/p1Tjpv-aJ
Thanks for reading and commenting on Last of the First. I thought your story, The Line was a great use of the prompt and vivid in its intensity.
Aloha,
Doug
I liked the story Doug, it was very realistic and I imagine that’s how the last one must feel. Such an awesome experienced shared by only a few can’t possibly leave a man untouched. My only crit is the first line. “I remember skip-hopping, …” I expected to read straight into …something else. the comma after “skip-hopping” gave me an unexpected pause. I love the word, though, because it conjures up a specific image.
Dear Madison,
I know what you mean. i tripped over that speed bump several times myself. The reason I decided to leave it in was that it seemed to more closely reflect the way thoughts trip off the brain and into thought. Seemed appropriate for the old pilot/writer. Thanks for reading, commenting and organizing.
May I send you a photo for a future prompt?
Aloha,
Doug
Please do send a photo. I’m sure you have a lot of them! I’m keeping a pool of them and will be picking the one I like most from them each month for the first Friday post. So far there are two I think in the running for next month.
T’ll dredge through the archives and see if I have any good ones.
Aloha,
Doug
This is great Doug – as a space nerd myself I loved the descriptions. I often wonder what it would have felt like for the 24 (I think?) that have done it, and I think it would probably be a lot like this. The image of the parabolic dust arcs is perfect. Nice one!
Thanks for already commenting on mine, but I’m a greedy stats monkey too haha.
Brian (http://pinionpost.com/2012/05/11/the-runaway/)
Dear Brian,
Thanks for the kind comments. 12 men have walked on the moon. Not near enough considering how long we’ve had since then. Humans are short sighted, I guess.
I love that my ‘greedy stat monkey’ comment has resonated so deeply with everyone. Pleases to add to yours,
Aloha,
Doug
Ah yes, I must be thinking of the poor guys orbiting who never got to go down (although what a view).
Doug I hope you made the stat you wanted!My best day ever was 332 and I found myself getting addicted but i’m over it now π π π no I’m not, that’s a lie!
I love your story, a unique interpretation and great use of language too π
Made 220 or so. Good day. I suppose I should be glad they all didn’t comment as I try to answer all of them. Thanks for your compliments re Last of the First.
Aloha,
Doug
Sorry I wasn’t around to up your numbers on Friday, Doug. How did that go?
I enjoyed your story – how amazing it would be to look at the moon like that? you gave us all kinds of sensory gifts in your reminiscing.
I think you’ve already visited, but I’m over here: http://elmowrites.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/friday-fiction-halloween/
Hi Elmo,
Made my number and then some. Can’t imagine breaking 220 now so I’ll probably go back to my old ways. The best stat is seeing your name come up on the feed. Thanks for visiting.
Aloha,
Doug
Such a charmer, Doug. Congrats on 220, I’ll have to make that my new goal!
excellent description!
skip-hopping – read this as sky hopping at first, which added an odd element.
Coming back after a while away…i sought to have your story to start my week…Thanks for this great effort…memories are always sweet to tingle. I can’t but imagine how it would be with me when i climax such age when i should be the only kind of my generation remaining…
Stories in your pocket – thought you might enjoy this and even participate – why not http://gu.com/p/37hb8/tw via The Guardian
My story is under the pseudonym ‘Red Bird Flies’ and its called ‘The Muster’ will post it on my blog on Wednesday. Bonne Continuation!
Hey Doug,
As of 11 a.m. Tuesday, I have 122 views. How are you doing?
Ron
Dear Ron,
As of 6:15AM Tuesday I have 11 views and they’re probably just checking to see whether I’ve broken my long standing habit of not posting anything all week except FridayFictioneer stuff. I really ought to post more but I just can’t post for posting’s sake. The spirit has to move me, yes?
Just down to the House of Stone (dorm facility for observatory staff at 9,000ft. Breakfast is on the desk next to me and sleep will be calling in about 1.5 hours.
Have a good one.
Aloha,
Doug