Yank Thou

29 Oct

100 words for Friday Fictioneers based on the photo prompt below.


Three Cheers

 (Copyright Melanie Greenwood)

Early Wednesday morning. The courtyard was empty. Queen Elise, in Tyrian purple, sat poised on her throne. Her kingdom spanned the known world and many imaginary ones but she had no staff save for some reprobate jesters and old Reverend Spooner, her herald. Another week was about to start.

The hour arrived. The courtyard filled. Reverend Spooner quieted the room and spoke to the assembled throng.

“On this, the second anniversary of her coronation, please join me in offering a heartfelt three chairs for our queer old Dean!”

Elise sighed, then smiled. At least Russell hadn’t called her that yet.



Queen Elise and Reverend SpoonerQueen Elise and the Reverend Spooner

35 Responses to “Yank Thou”

  1. Sandra October 29, 2014 at 9:26 am #

    There ought to be a button for ‘falls on the floor laughing’. ‘Like’ seems so inappropriate for the occasion. 🙂 An oldie but goodie.

    • dmmacilroy October 29, 2014 at 9:47 am #

      Dear Sandra,

      I’m thinking of changing my name to ‘Oldie, but goodie.’ Seems like the right time of my life. Thanks for laughing (Not falling. Be careful down there.)



  2. AnElephantCant October 29, 2014 at 9:46 am #

    Boom, boom!

  3. rochellewisoff October 29, 2014 at 10:11 am #

    Dear Rev Spooner,

    I look back in amazement over the past two years. Two significant things happened in 2012. The first was asking Madison how to get involved and the second was saying hello to a stranger in a Facebook instant message. Who knew?
    I raise my scoyal repter and smile. I feel very much like Rindercellar who slopped her dripper and married the pransom hince.

    Yank thou fry mear drend.



    • dmmacilroy October 29, 2014 at 10:18 am #

      My Queer old Dean,

      You are yost melcome. I am sappy to be of hervice.

      Now wack to bork!


      The Rev

  4. Snow's Fissures and Fractures October 29, 2014 at 11:39 am #

    I suspect there will be more even more laughter reading the comments, so I’ll be sure to come back. Thank you for making me laugh on this gloomy Wednesday.

  5. Claire Fuller October 29, 2014 at 11:58 am #

    Love it! Very funny. How do you do this every week? (Write a brilliant FF.)

  6. storydivamg October 29, 2014 at 1:34 pm #

    I suspected there was silliness afoot upon reading your title, and you did not disappoint, Doug. I trust the beneficent queen looks graciously upon her herald who so skillfully juggles the spoonerisms in the presence of us jesters.


    • rochellewisoff October 29, 2014 at 10:22 pm #

      Thou knowest the queer old dean, Mester Jarie. 😉

      • storydivamg October 30, 2014 at 1:52 am #

        Of course, dye mere Pempress of Urple.

        *Denuflects geeply*
        Garie Mail

  7. Caerlynn Nash October 29, 2014 at 1:55 pm #

    Hmm… All this backin’ talkwards! Someone has their tongue wrapped around their eye teeth and can’t see what they’re saying.
    Nice, Doug. Hank thou for the morning giggle.

  8. aliciajamtaas October 29, 2014 at 3:57 pm #

    This was a perfect way to greet the day! Your piece made me smile and warmed the cockles of my heart. Thank you.

  9. elmowrites October 29, 2014 at 6:40 pm #

    Now there’s a tribute. I’ll join those three chairs from her with a glass of the best pum runch.

  10. Suzanne Joshi October 29, 2014 at 7:09 pm #

    Doug, An apt humorous story to celebrate with. Well written as always. We raise our glasses in a toast. 🙂 — Susan

  11. lingeringvisions by Dawn October 29, 2014 at 9:35 pm #

    Hair! Hair! Long live the Queer!

  12. David Stewart October 30, 2014 at 12:59 am #

    Dear Doug,
    this is satisfying on so many levels. The name Spooner tugged at my memory but I didn’t remember where it I’d heard it until the Queer old Dean line. Long live Queen Elise, ruler of so many imaginary realms. 🙂
    Take care,

  13. Perry Block (@PerryBlock) October 30, 2014 at 1:16 am #

    “A heartfelt three chairs for our queer old Dean!” I love it! But, where is the queer old Dean in the picture? Why didn’t you add him?! And where’s Nessie?

  14. waitingforaname October 30, 2014 at 1:29 am #

    Thoroughly charming! 😉

  15. The Writer's Village October 30, 2014 at 2:01 am #

    Rev Spooner must have been the first Bogi Yerra.
    But all hail the person who can quote: It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.
    Because some people just calls them as they seize them.

    To the King of whimsicality and technicality – a heinous tribute to the little princess.


  16. patrickprinsloo October 30, 2014 at 10:49 am #

    Fun. Could be a medal in it for you.

  17. wildbilbo October 30, 2014 at 11:18 am #

    Ahhh spoonerisms. Fantastic 🙂

  18. Leona H - Shadow Strokes October 30, 2014 at 4:25 pm #

    Very cute!

  19. hafong October 30, 2014 at 7:47 pm #

    I love the humour. First time I got anything right away. 🙂


  20. talesfromthemotherland October 31, 2014 at 12:34 am #

    Such a delight, Doug! I loved this one… still stewing over your fabulous photo 2 weeks ago. I may write a story yet, but at the time, the beach was just goo tood!

  21. Ellespeth October 31, 2014 at 3:27 am #

    🙂 What a lovely and silly tribute!

  22. Bastet October 31, 2014 at 6:57 am #

    What a fun right Doug … and long hail the queen … we all yank her and raise my glass of toddy saying long may she reign! Georgia.

  23. draliman October 31, 2014 at 8:59 am #

    Funny 🙂

  24. subroto October 31, 2014 at 12:30 pm #

    Ah, fuch a sun story Dough, i kneaded a laugh.

  25. Carrie October 31, 2014 at 6:35 pm #

    hilarious 🙂

  26. Nan Falkner November 3, 2014 at 5:14 am #

    Dear Doug, Funny – I need some pum runch too! Such a tilly sale! Wuv it! Nan 🙂

  27. rgayer55 November 3, 2014 at 11:34 am #

    Ha! Yes, that’s one name I hadn’t thought to call her yet. Thanks for bringing it to my attention. A very fitting tribute. Now, where some of that pum runch Jennifer was talking about?

  28. Dreamer of Dreams November 4, 2014 at 10:31 pm #

    That was very funny! Spoonerisms! Yes! Loved your story. I also love any story with the word “reprobate.”

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