Tirez mon Doigt

22 Nov

On this day I am thankful for my friends in the Friday Fictioneeer’s community of writers. They are tirelessly tolerant of my tendency toward tomfoolery and if I was a turkey (some will argue that there is no question there) I would be given a seat at the table and a bowl of grain instead of being had for dinner. Many Mahalos to you all.

100 words of historical fiction about the origins of Le Pétomane and the dangers of too many one cheek sneaks. Ah, Thanksgiving. Tis the season. Aloha, D.

Story links here. Monsieur Pujol’s history here. And, for Russell and Perry and Randy only, there is this.

November 23rd, 1892. On his way to Paris and the Moulin Rouge, Joseph Pujol stopped at the Cimetiere les Caillols outside of Marseilles to pay grateful respect to his late uncle Pêter. Joseph stared at the bizarre death mask and enigmatic pointing finger on the tombstone and laughed, remembering the lunatic expression that went so well with their family’s strange proclivity. An untimely end? Without a doubt. Inadvertently asphyxiating himself was not something he wanted in his own epitaph, but Joseph knew by the look on Pêter’s face, that even in death the master farteur still appreciated a good joke.

51 Responses to “Tirez mon Doigt”

  1. tedstrutz November 22, 2012 at 10:32 pm #

    Where do you find this stuff??!?!? I’m sure Russell, Perry and Randy are still on that link…

    • tedstrutz November 22, 2012 at 10:32 pm #

      p.s. Aloha…

      • Douglas MacIlroy November 22, 2012 at 10:37 pm #

        Dear Ted,

        This is the third week in a row where the story emanated from the the title, which, in this week’s case, was all I could think when staring at the photo prompt.

        Aloha back, my friend.

        yours,

        Doug

      • tedstrutz November 23, 2012 at 9:12 pm #

        You are amazingly well read, Doug. Your stories have many layers.

  2. TheOthers1 November 22, 2012 at 10:52 pm #

    You crack me up. Master Farteur? Lol. Well done and happy thanksgiving to you. 🙂

    • Douglas MacIlroy November 22, 2012 at 11:05 pm #

      Dear CC,

      Farteur and Fartiste were actual names applied to performers whose skills in that area were good enough to support them. Amazing world we live in, eh?

      Happy Thanksgiving to you, too.

      Aloha,

      Doug

      • TheOthers1 November 23, 2012 at 1:08 am #

        Ah, and you have educated me. Thank you kindly. 🙂

  3. rochellewisoff November 22, 2012 at 11:06 pm #

    Dear Doug,
    Once more I doff my chapeau to you, mon ami (with a curtsy and a dainty pêter). Thanks for the unprecedented history lesson. An education and a delighted chuckle.
    Shalom,
    Rochelle

    • Douglas MacIlroy November 22, 2012 at 11:09 pm #

      Merci, Mademoiselle Rochelle,

      I appreciate your refined response to my overblown exercise in Flatulent Fiction. Looking forward to reading yours.

      Aloha,

      Doug

  4. wmqcolby November 22, 2012 at 11:45 pm #

    Gives new meaning to the initials for Rest In Peace. A very satisfying ending — deadly, but not silent. I hoped for the best and got it! Merci, merci me.

  5. Madison Woods November 23, 2012 at 1:20 am #

    Doug, if history lessons had always been so entertaining, I might have gotten better grades! Too funny. And I couldn’t help it, I know my name isn’t Russell, Randy or Perry… yes, Ted is right. They’re probably all still there counting farts.

    • dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 12:55 pm #

      Dear Madison,

      I know just what you mean. Thaks for commenting and not getting caught counting…

      Aloha,

      Doug

  6. boomiebol November 23, 2012 at 3:51 am #

    Love it lol…funny

  7. R. E. Hunter November 23, 2012 at 4:54 am #

    Wow, it must have been bad to asphyxiate himself.

    • dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 12:56 pm #

      DearMr. Hunter,

      Small room, large dinner. Who knows what is possible? Thanks for commenting.

      Aloha,

      Doug

  8. Joyce November 23, 2012 at 4:59 am #

    I don’t know French very well, but can sure make out those words. Ha Ha. He must have been at least as much of a comic as my guy, Dicky, but in a more natural way. lol

  9. Sandra November 23, 2012 at 8:45 am #

    Unique take on the prompt Doug; such a very apt interpretation of the photo. Nice one!

    • dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 12:59 pm #

      Dear Sandra,

      Thanks for noticing that the story really did fit the photo prompt. Everyone is getting lost in the fog of the subject matter…

      Aloha,

      Doug

  10. unspywriter November 23, 2012 at 12:22 pm #

    Great! ;-D

    Here’s mine: http://unexpectedpaths.com/friday-fictioneers/bete-noire/

  11. sustainabilitea November 23, 2012 at 12:42 pm #

    Laughed at your lovely alliteration in the introduction and kept right on laughing at your unique bit of hilarious insanity! Where DO you come up with these ideas? Too little oxygen at higher altitudes while star-gazing doesn’t even begin to explain it, but don’t stop. Who’d a thunk you could get on Wikipedia and your five minutes, or five farts, of fame for flatulence!?! Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving before popping this one out.

    • dmmacilroy November 25, 2012 at 12:49 am #

      Dear Janet,

      You give good comment, especially the last sentence. Thanks for being patient with me this week. I tried to reflect the mood of times without overly focusing on the singular nature of M. Pujol’s skills in the area in question. Thanks for reading from beginning to the end. I appreciate your patience and hope that next week’s photo prompt ellicits more in my mind than the story wrote this week.

      Aloha,

      Doug

      • sustainabilitea November 25, 2012 at 2:31 am #

        Doug, i often learn something new and interesting from your posts. As for this week’s story, I didn’t feel mine was inspired or new and edgy, but just tried to make it the best I could with what came to mind. I got a good laugh at your story this week. It was a gas. 🙂

  12. writeondude November 23, 2012 at 1:59 pm #

    Fantastic. You couldn’t make up the life of Le Petomane if you tried. Well done Doug.

    My favourite excerpt from Wiki: Some of the highlights of his stage act involved sound effects of cannon fire and thunderstorms, as well as playing “‘O Sole Mio” and “La Marseillaise” on an ocarina through a rubber tube in his anus. He could also blow out a candle from several yards away.

    • dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 1:03 pm #

      Thank you, Sir,

      Cannon fire and Thunderstorms! Have to love it.

      Thanks for commenting.

      Aloha,

      Doug

  13. bridgesareforburning November 23, 2012 at 2:34 pm #

    Hi Doug,
    Appreciate you trying to provide a little cultural education. My French vocabulary will be permanently expanded by one word, farteur. I didn’t need a translation. Ron

    • dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 1:04 pm #

      Or Fartiste,

      Both great words. Wish I could have seen/heard his act. Thank you for commenting.

      Aloha,

      Doug

  14. Kathy McClure November 23, 2012 at 5:51 pm #

    Gonna show this to the kids so they remember history can be fun!

  15. rgayer55 November 23, 2012 at 8:48 pm #

    Dear Doug,
    You’ve got to be pulling my finger. What did you and Ted dine on when he came to the island, beans? Thanks for mentioning the ghastly trio in your intro.

  16. brudberg November 23, 2012 at 9:02 pm #

    Farteur is indeed a valuable addition to my vocabulary, goes nicely together with flatulist. Nice business card ideas are forming in my mind 😉

    • rochellewisoff November 23, 2012 at 9:53 pm #

      Please send out your cards, Björn. Hahahahahahahah. The comments are getting as good as Doug’s story.;)

    • dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 1:09 pm #

      Dear Bjorn,

      Happy to help. Thank you for commenting.

      Aloha,

      Doug

  17. rich November 24, 2012 at 3:31 am #

    well done. i’ve been accused of being the master farteur.

    • dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 1:10 pm #

      Dear Rich,

      It was probably the guy standing next to you. Thank you for stopping by.

      Aloha,

      Doug

  18. Brian Benoit November 24, 2012 at 4:23 pm #

    I wouldn’t pull that finger, though I will say this makes me awfully proud of my French heritage. Great story, as usual

  19. 40again November 25, 2012 at 11:08 pm #

    Dear Doug
    A great story for the prompt and a nice history lesson to boot. Never heard the word Farteur before, though I’ve come up with a few similar names for various male relatives in my time……………

    Dee

    • dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 1:13 pm #

      Dear Dee,

      The men seem to be bearing the brunt of the ‘comments’ on my story. Oh well. I guess we deserve it. Thank you for commenting.

      Aloha,

      Doug

  20. Perry Block (@PerryBlock) November 26, 2012 at 9:41 am #

    Yes, somebody has to class up the Friday Fictioneers and who better? I thought this was a put-on until I read it more carefully.

    What “an untimely end” for someone with such a proclivity! And pulling a David Carradine all at the same time. No wonder that’s a smile that only an asphyxiating farteur could love!

    Great use of the prompt and lots of fun in such a relative few words. Han Solo would approve. And then probably fart.

    • dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 1:14 pm #

      Dear Perry,

      Thanks for your tongue in cheek comments. Just couldn’t hold this story in.

      Aloha,

      Doug

  21. vbholmes November 27, 2012 at 6:10 pm #

    (Quotation found on www,vh1.com:) “Nothing gives Gérard Depardieu more pleasure than asking a lovely young lady to “Pull His Finger”, only to let out the slowest, richest, most decadently velveteen fart produced since Le Petomane played Carnegie Hall….” Now tell me, can you beat “the slowest, richest, most decadently velveteen…” in the description department?

    • dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 1:18 pm #

      Dear VB,

      I guess not, though I’m tempted to try. That is some smooth writing. Thank you for dropping by to comment.

      Aloha,

      Doug

  22. dmmacilroyDouglas macIlroy November 28, 2012 at 1:09 pm #

    Dear Tom,

    Natural gas. Fueling the world. Thanks for commenting.

    Aloha,

    Doug

  23. arjun bagga December 19, 2012 at 10:52 am #

    Awesome. You are a reader’s delight. 4 stories down and each one reminds of Hemingway’s “A movable feast”. Following you Sir.

    • dmmacilroy December 19, 2012 at 10:55 am #

      Dear Arjun,

      And you, sir, are a writer’s delight. Many mahalos for visiting, reading and following.

      Aloha,

      Doug

      • arjun bagga December 19, 2012 at 10:57 am #

        Dear Doug,

        Your observation is bang on. I am a better reader than a writer.
        Cheers,

        Arjun

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